Their last conversations played over again in his head
“You know brother, I think father loves you but he doesn’t know how to tell you because he had been pretty fxxked up to you all this years and right now his heart has been built to not give in.”
“I do Adams I do, I pray every day that one day I would come home and see you both laughing and hugging each other and that mother would be healthy and strong again and we would be that happy family I know you want. I think something is wrong with dad..now that I am a certified resident doctor, I would fix him’’ Damien laughs taking a gulp of his 6th bottle for the night
“Yeah, while you are at it, fix his brains too, he needs a reset, like a computer booth” Adams laughs keeping his eyes on the road “ you know, you have had enough to drink D, I don’t want him to say I took you to get you drunk”
“hey..no. its my happy day I can do what the hell I want…I am so happy’’ he screams, Adam laughs
“besides you took more than 5 bottles, and you snorted that coke “
“because you forced me, making me feel guilty for not indulging you and your friends, crazy by the way’’
Damien snorted “Lydia had a fine ass, whoof! she was grinding into me all night.. I swear I wanted to finish the party back at home but I was so high we did it in the bathroom” he said laughing, Adam shakes his head
‘’I hope you used protection?”
“ I may be high but not stupid besides, when last did you have some?’’
“Too long. But I don’t concern myself with girls. I have more important things to think of like, what to do with my life aside writing”
Damien drowns his drink, lighting a cigarette, he inhales “You are going to be a renowned novelist and get a writers grant and be the netk J.k Rowlings or some bad ass author, and then you are going to be sought all over the world making movies and maybe own your own writing firm and movie studio and when you come home you are going to have this hot banging wife you would sink yourself into and live happily ever after. Just don’t wait to fall in love though, I hate seeing you alone..” Damien sniffs
“I am not alone, I have you and mother, “
“Always and forever?” Damien turns to him
“Always and forever” Adams ruffles his brothers hair
“ And I know even if you don’t admit it to me…you love pa.,,and because I know one day all this is going to be history I am going to make sure even if I grow old and grey, I’ll make sure you both feel that love a father and son ought to feel, I would make sure of that. Believe that brother”
“oh don’t dream. There is nothing between me and that man”
“well we shall see about that I would remind you of this day when you both are hugging and crying and holding each other and asking for forgiveness’’ I would remind you.’ ‘
Adams shook his head, “Yeah, thats like till hell freezes over or I see an angel with white glorious wings”
“hmm till then. In the main time I am so fxxking high I swear I can fly…wait..I can fly!!” he opens the roof of the car, stands on the chair, spreading his hands wide and throwing his head back he screams “I believe I can flyyyyyy!!!” he keeps bellowing going off key with R-kelly’s hit song, Adams is laughing and shaking his head, the car climbs over a stone he didn’t see and that caused Damien to stagger a bit..he wasn’t holding on to anything, and they were nearing the bend and so he reaches out for his brother, tugging at his jeans
“Hey D..STOP IT!! Get inside..Damien get in and sit..C’mon mehn”
“No!! I am flying baby whooohooo!!’’ he screams. Adam was trying to focus on the dark road and trying to pull his brother in, he leaned in towards him with one hand while the other one was on the steer wheel
‘’hey D..Stop it get in.. Damien don’t be a dick get in”
“ I love you Adams, I love you mother..I love you OLD BAT GERALDDDDD!! AND I LOVE MY LIFE I AM A FXXKING RESIDENT DOCTOR..WHHOOOOHOOO!!!’’ he screams closing his eyes and leaning all the way back..
“DAMN IT DAMIEN GET INTO TH-” and so he looks away from the road just briefly to drag his brother to sit. He shouldn’t have, a truck swerved in from the bend without horning, and it was dark and the streets lights were dim…
He turned back too late, he tried to hold the brakes too late, it hits them from the left pushing them off the road and over the cliff.
He literally saw Damien flying off the car and he reached out to catch him but he was too far, his seat belt was holding him down. The car plunged downwards rolling and hitting rocks a couple of times. He remembered emptying his insides as the car kept rolling and he became dizzy, his head hitting the chair before he finally passed out calling ‘’DAMIEN!!’’
When he opened his eyes, bolts of pain shorts through his ribs and arms, his head was bleeding and the car bag was suffocating him. He could hear voices overhead and see the dancing lights of the siren from the mirror of the car.. but he couldn’t hear his brother’s voice..
Then he knew why.. Damien was a few feet from where the car landed, his skull was broken with his brains all spluttered all over the rock he landed on.. his eyes where closed and he had the smile he had on his face just before they began to fall.
They said he screamed like a mad man when they came down for him, they said he wouldn’t let go of his brother when he got to him, they said he cried for days unending not leaving his graveside, they said he tried to take his life that’s why he was restrained for weeks.
What ever they said didn’t prepare him for the torment he felt day and night seeing his brother with a broken skull and a smile on his face. He wondered if he knew, He wondered if he suffered or died as soon as he hit hard rock, he would have felt better to know if he didn’t suffer.
Nothing prepared him for the guilt and the anger he felt and the agony he was going through, for because of him his brother who had a promising future died.
Gerald had become a mad man on hearing the news, he had carried a gun to end his life, but the police had restrained him telling him it was an accident. But he wouldn’t have blamed him, not even when he had called him a “Murderer!!!! Murderer!! You killed him because you knew he was the only important person in my life, my boy my boy you killed him” Gerald had broken down and cried over his son’s body.,and when he had looked back up all the hatred and anger he felt towards him intensified. Adam could literally see it take form
“I am sorry I am sorry I didn’t see the truck I didn’t..i didn’t” Adam fell to his knees and cried.
Gerald couldn’t arrest him because he couldn’t prove it in court that he had killed his brother, oh he tried, but the truck driver came forward, he had bad brakes and his tyres had punctured due to the spikes he ran over. He served a couple of months in prison for negligence and then he was freed.
It was an accident.
Gerald never forgive him and he never forgive himself. He never could bear the hurt in his mother’s eyes when she screamed into his shoulders and cried for her boy. And then she gets a stroke, which paralyzed her .
His father wanted him out. Ordered him out but he couldn’t leave his mother, she was alone. His father drank more, cursed more, going back to the way he was and worse before Damien arrived. His mother’s grief was silent but yet loud. He couldn’t take her away because his father wouldn’t let him, and he couldn’t leave her alone even though his father wanted to kill him .
So he fought him.
Their hate for each other was unparalleled, Gerald took one look at him and went into a fit of rage and a slew of curses flew from his tongue. He only tolerated him because his sick wife, his mother didn’t want anyone else to take care of her and wanted her only son to be by her side.
Adam stayed just because of his mother, he knew if there was any chance of him and his father ever having a cordial relationship, it went away the day Damien died.
Its being 5 years but the scar was an open wound that refused to heal, constantly widening like an open sea drowning him in.
Going ahead to become a self acclaimed novelist and written a book or two, his sadness made him a lonely man, even his books and writing didn’t give him peace and whenever he shuts his eyes he saw Damien smiling at him and screaming “ I am flying brother”
“I wish, I had flown with you or better still I wish you were here and I would gladly have taken your place” Adam stood at his grave, placing a flower there he sighed “I miss you brother so much, mother too. Even the old bat does too. I am so sorry”’ he cried.
Its being five long years and nothing had changed. Nothing .
His father still hated him worse than he had ever done, and he shared the same sentiments, he wanted to go far away.. but he couldn’t. His mother was the only family he had left and she was sick and needed care.
The doctors had told them to take her to the elder-lies home but she had refused, he too didn’t want her to go away from him. Gerald spent less and less time at home and wouldn’t have cared either way but he didn’t push when she said she didn’t want to go to any hospital or any old people’s home and if she had to die she would die in her house.
The only other solution was to get a stay-in nurse to look after her. In the space of 6 months 12 nurses had come and left in a few days or weeks.
Either they couldn’t cope with the demands of his mother or they couldn’t stand the heat of him and his father’s quarrels which could literally burn anyone that tried to come between them. He didn’t blame them.. he too sometimes had to go away for days to cool off, hoping by the time he was back his father had gone for one of his many trips.
He was sure the hospital were tired of sending them new nurses every now and then.
The money his father was paying to them was fat, but sometimes peace of mind and a sane environment was better than a few thousands in one’s pocket. No wonder they all left the minute Gerald or him transferred their aggression on them.
And he hoped that the nurses too would take a hint and stay out of their business and face their job, he wanted someone to take care of his mother not play advocate for him and his father. he knew his mother tried to make them do it, tried to make them get him and his father to come talk to her together but it always ends up backfiring or getting any of the nurses .
Adam sighed as he stared at his brother’s grave “I wish you were here brother.. I didn’t get to tell you I love you that day, I hope you know I do”
The only light in his little darkness was his mother and he was not going to let it go out, if it did he would die..literally a thousand more deaths than the one he did when Damien did.
Marybeth drops down from the cab that took her to her new residence of work. She whistled seeing the huge mansion facing her.. “Damn!! I guess this people must be totally loaded” she says to herself
It took a while before securities let her in after going through credentials and needed info
“crap I am just a nurse and you are searching me and asking me so many questions as though I am a sister to Bin Laden” she snaps
“sorry ma”am, just needed precaution” the security tells her
“well I would understand if whoever owns this place was a mayor or something. I mean come on that’s my lipstick and don’t touch my panties” she slaps his hands away from touching her underwear as she grabs her red lipstick from him “really?” she looks at him
“sorry ma’am, go right ahead”
“thank you”!! she replies walking in
“I hope she doesn’t run away like the others, that house is a war zone when the boss and his son are around. Hate to be in her shoes..” she overhears him talking to his buddy. She didn’t stand to listen to his reply.
The butler ushers her in and shows her into her room, then he takes her to go see the lady of the house, as she realized she is called
“So, who is the boss of this sweet place?” she tries to make small talk with the butler who didn’t look as though he knew how to smile, he was cold just like the house. Despite how beautiful it was, it still lacked that warmth of a home.
“MR Pope is the master of the house ma’am and he has a son, Mr Adams, it would be best you stay clear from both of them if you want to work here. That advice is free.” he says
“Really?” she scoffs “why is that..are they like the zombies, pray tell ?”
“Your humor is not welcomed here ma’am’’ he frowns, knocking twice before opening a door, to reveal a woman, who looked small and frail on the bed, staring into nothing but dancing candles on the wall
“Miss Stowe, this is Mrs Thelma Pope, the lady of the house and she is the one to which you are to render your services to as an in-nurse. All you need to know about her health I believe you would have been briefed at the hospital and if you require any information please go through her charts by her foot head. Anything else, please do let me know. I must warn you…patience is a necessity but she is quite a lovely woman when she is herself” and with that he leaves
Marybeth walks to her, she didn’t move nor acknowledge as though she realized someone had walked into the room, she sits down beside her and carefully takes her hands and holds it
“Hello Thelma, is it okay if I call you Thelma? My name is Marybeth Stowe, your new nurse, but you can call me Marybeth?” she said, rubbing her palm
Slowly thelma’s eyes shifts away from the wall and focuses on her
“Yes ..that’s it. Hello ?”” Marybeth says
“Who are you?”
“ I am here to take care of you Mrs Pope, is that okay?”
“ It doesn’t matter.. you would soon leave just like the others. You know, he doesn’t come to visit me or check on me.. and the other one, his eyes are so sad ..so, so sad when he reads to me”
“ Who is he Thelma “?
“Gerald.. he is away again isn’t he? And Adam..Adam is so quiet so sad.. Damien, oh my sweet boy..” she said
The boss and the Son ok, but who was Damien? the butler didn’t mention any Damien. Was this woman crazy? Marybeth wondered, they told her she was coming to help a woman who had stroke and had been bed ridden for years, they didn’t tell her she was coming to play shrink to a woman who has gone COO-COO!!’
Then she heard their voices, bitter and angry and glass shattering.
“what the hell?” she mutters
“Again..they are at it again.” the woman sobs “make them stop please, Damien doesn’t like them fighting”
What the hell did she just walk into?
“I am sorry, if your family are having issues I best stay out of it. That’s not why I am here’’
“please..” she sobs
Sighing Marybeth stepped out . She shouldn’t have. She shouldn’t have listened
“Who the hell are you?” The younger man thunders her way when she came into view,
She looks up to see the coldest pairs of eyes she had ever seen
“Stowe, Marybeth stowe. The Nurse’’
“Get out from my sight, even your presence makes me feel sick” it was the older man who spoke.
Her mother used to say her stubbornness and sharp mouth would put her in trouble one day, she just never knew when.
“I would appreciate it if you don’t talk to me that way Mr” she says
“And please you both should keep your voices down because Mrs Thelma needs peace not two grown men bailing at each other’’
And with that she turned and left the men staring at her shocked.